On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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