Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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