so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
