We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
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