Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
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