My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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