I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
