I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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