I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
