i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Randomize
