No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
