You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Randomize
