I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
