I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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