ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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