So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
