how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Randomize
