Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize