Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
At least life still wants to fuck me.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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