hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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