I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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