He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
