South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
