I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Randomize
