Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize