I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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