so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
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