the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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