When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
