soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
