Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Randomize
