As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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