So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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