I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
