That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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