How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize