So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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