you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
