My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize