I'm going to jail i love you
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
