So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
