I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
