he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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