Sponge bath it is.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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