1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
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