Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I supernannyed him into submission
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
