I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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