he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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