Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
