i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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