Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
